Originally posted on my FB page:
The date almost slipped by me! 04/14/2005 is a day that I should never forget, but wouldn't you know it, I ALMOST DID! For all the talk I've done about celebrating on this day, the fanfare didn't happen. Let's just call it a testament to not letting the crappy stuff get me down...Ok, I'll fess up. I FORGOT. You'll stop to ask HOW if you know that 10 years ago I got the wake up call of a lifetime. As a new mom, even after your 3rd kid, you generally associate feeling run-down and being tired with the rigors of having a newborn. Falling asleep while nursing, not getting rid of the weight are all part of the everyday feelings of motherhood. While it's common to hear the words "congestive heart failure" and "cardiomyopathy", you truly don't expect it to be associated with you, a 34 year old woman who just her 3rd baby. You wouldn't think or expect to hear that having another child will likely kill you, even though having another kid was the furthest from your mind. You don't want to consider that the heart God has given you could possibly just stop at any moment.
10 years ago that was my life. My ♥ sisters will tell you, it's a moment you can't forget. Even after all this time, I'm on meds, as my cardio says, likely forever. I'm constantly in need to lose weight - the damn scale (it's really me that) is my enemy. How is it possible to forget? Do I think about it? Absolutely. Does it scare me. Hell. Yeah. The thoughts one has when laying in bed at night when all is quiet? Pretty frightening. My best explanation is that I didn't let that moment in 2005 define me.
We tell the kids all the time that life is all about choices. Every moment, every second, every thought, every action depends on YOU making the decision to do A, B, C or D. The path isn't always clear and it's never the same for anyone, but you should have an idea of where you want to end up. I've accepted that my choices, even with all the scary things, the feelings of loss and anger, the realization that it's all very finite, will bring me to place of happiness and contentment.
So 04/14/2015 has come and gone. I totally forgot the day, but I do remember my purpose: to live life fully with surrender, to know that I'm here for as long as I have, to share it with my loves, and to give back to all who will take what I'm offering.
Wednesday, April 15, 2015
Saturday, April 4, 2015
Feel like you've been in that window with Jamie forever? We FINALLY got ep 109 tonight and it truly did not disappoint. The feels, people. The FEELS. There was so much goodness in this ep, that even if you hated some of it, *cough* ANYTHING to do with Leghair *cough**eyeroll* it was quickly erased by the fireside escapade complete with threats and retaliation. In honor of this goodness, I've decided to give away a cuff or a keyholder to a lucky fan. Just enter after midnight tonight PST.
Good luck and remember #outlandersdoepicshit
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Good luck and remember #outlandersdoepicshit
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Monday, January 19, 2015
Coupons, anyone?
Chances are you already have one or two. Even better yet, you don't want a cuff or a key holder. Don't like 'em, never would wear them, they're just not for you. If any of these applies, it's all good, but could you help me and your fellow fangirls out by forwarding the link to a few coupons? There's gotta be one or two out there who might want a deal. 
Friday, January 16, 2015
Thursday, August 21, 2014
Quarterly Visit
Despite the fact that I promised to keep it updated, I've slacked quite a bit. Thank goodness I don't neglect my family for this long...I'm sure they feel like it, though.
RL has just been a doozy since last spring. As with life, change is inevitable and dealing with the aftermath is what we can't really gauge for weeks, if not months, after. Hindsight and all that rot. I'm still looking back to see and right now it's still a blur. We can probably just move on and I'll just rewind the reel on my own.
Emotionally I've been through one hell of a roller coaster. Who would have thought that Senior Year for a kid would send someone off the deep end? Sending off our oldest into the world, 3000 miles away, was the hardest thing I'd ever had to face. The emotions I felt were so overwhelming - the pride and the sadness just did me in. It absolutely was worth the pain, but it did take me off guard. Regardless, the kidlet is settled into her dorm and is on her way. She does have a long road ahead and I won't get to touch her until December. I'll just count down the days...
I'm noticing as I venture further into my 40s that I really didn't know shit 10, 15, 20, 30 years ago. It's more and more apparant and I feel like apologizing profusely everyday to anyone 10 years older than I am. You know when "old" folks just shake their heads? Yeah, well, that's because THEY KNOW that the younger crowd (anyone 10-15 years behind them and beyond) is just plain STUPID. They've learned to stop wasting their breath. That realization just doesn't hit someone until they get into their mid-40s. All the energy we expelled before that has been completely wasted. Our contemporaries just know better and are better at banking that energy to keep them going a lot longer in the future.
RL has just been a doozy since last spring. As with life, change is inevitable and dealing with the aftermath is what we can't really gauge for weeks, if not months, after. Hindsight and all that rot. I'm still looking back to see and right now it's still a blur. We can probably just move on and I'll just rewind the reel on my own.
Emotionally I've been through one hell of a roller coaster. Who would have thought that Senior Year for a kid would send someone off the deep end? Sending off our oldest into the world, 3000 miles away, was the hardest thing I'd ever had to face. The emotions I felt were so overwhelming - the pride and the sadness just did me in. It absolutely was worth the pain, but it did take me off guard. Regardless, the kidlet is settled into her dorm and is on her way. She does have a long road ahead and I won't get to touch her until December. I'll just count down the days...
*****
I'm noticing as I venture further into my 40s that I really didn't know shit 10, 15, 20, 30 years ago. It's more and more apparant and I feel like apologizing profusely everyday to anyone 10 years older than I am. You know when "old" folks just shake their heads? Yeah, well, that's because THEY KNOW that the younger crowd (anyone 10-15 years behind them and beyond) is just plain STUPID. They've learned to stop wasting their breath. That realization just doesn't hit someone until they get into their mid-40s. All the energy we expelled before that has been completely wasted. Our contemporaries just know better and are better at banking that energy to keep them going a lot longer in the future.
Monday, April 28, 2014
Be Still?
I'm not ignoring you. I have so much stuff going on. A summary of my weekend:
Friday - Scholarship planning meeting. So glad she's got a few. The airfare alone is like tuition!
Saturday - The Senior with PRT at 7 am. The Senior with Prom. AND the kidlet with First Eucharist. Hair had to be done. Oh, and there was a party involved. Food, drink and everything. (If you know anything about Filipino parties, this is no joke. Even the smallest one will have food for eons. As it stands, we tried to give most of it away. I'm working on the finishing off the garlic fried chicken tomorrow. Pancit is gone. We do have 3 more lumpia, but that's for snack time tomorrow.)
Sunday - Show property for 3 hours. This is how I plan to pay for those airline tickets. Last Faith Formation class at church to say goodbye to my senior class. The night ended on a high: GAME OF THRONES!
In a few words, I'm screwed for May June, July, and August. There's only so much "planning-ahead" a person can do. Believe it or not, this is actually a light year for me. Just ask anyone. I have dropped a few other duties that fit better when I was younger. This can't continue as I muddle through my 40s!!!
Here is what's on my plate for the next month:
~ Work - It's never ending and it's a given.
~ Landlord walkthrough - Remember how my landlord was kind enough to lower my rent $250/mo? We get to sign the lease tomorrow, but they also get to do a walk-through. Recall what I said about my house: HOARDERS. I am still cleaning at 9:00 pm.
~ Hem two band dresses for band performances on Wednesday night and for San Francisco Festival - Let me do that tomorrow after the walkthrough!
~ Chaperoning the middle school band-kid and 100 others at a competition in San Francisco - This needs no explanation. Prayers are welcome.
~ Preparing for my time away from the Hoosband and other kidlets - this means, making sure the tot has a way to and from school and making sure the kidlet and the Senior make it to the overnight event with the troop. Hopefully they'll feed themselves.
~ On top of this, I have 3 events (one work related and 2 fundraisers for 2 separate boards that I participate with) 2 BACK TO BACK, Fri/Sat and the other the following week - Expectations are HIGH for each. I have to beg for the next week and I have 4 days when I'm MIA locally. That really puts a kink into the plans.
~ On the backburner for May until I can get thru the fundraisers: Announcements, Grad party planning, mission trip planning for the Mid-Kid, Summer Bridge for the Grad, what to do with the kidlet for the summer while inhouse babysitting is away, Sending off the firstborn to the world. Don't get me started with that. I'm getting choked up just typing it.
~ DG's Pasadena signing - Arrangements have been made, but I have a feeling my mother will throw a wrench into the whole thing. More on that later.
~ Outlander at SDCC - This. Will. Be. EPIC.
~ OUTLANDER SOMETIME BEFORE SEPTEMBER (my guess is 1st wk of August, but who the hell knows).
I think Mother's Day is in there somewhere. Remind me, would ya?
I know I need to exercise, too. My job, if I'm not in the field, involves sitting on my ass. This is where I KNOW the extra 20 lbs came from. I just need to move the ass and eat better. That's another post.
Despite it all, my bitching and moaning, the headaches and sleepless nights, I know there's purpose. If I take a moment, just a small moment, mind you, I can feel the happiness of everyone around me. It's what I crave. In my mind, my success is measured by the satisfaction I feel when someone tells me how great a job I did for them. It makes the pains all worth it for me. Crazy? Probably. Would I do it all again? Absolutely! What would make it perfect? MORE TIME TO FANGIRL.
Friday - Scholarship planning meeting. So glad she's got a few. The airfare alone is like tuition!
Saturday - The Senior with PRT at 7 am. The Senior with Prom. AND the kidlet with First Eucharist. Hair had to be done. Oh, and there was a party involved. Food, drink and everything. (If you know anything about Filipino parties, this is no joke. Even the smallest one will have food for eons. As it stands, we tried to give most of it away. I'm working on the finishing off the garlic fried chicken tomorrow. Pancit is gone. We do have 3 more lumpia, but that's for snack time tomorrow.)
Sunday - Show property for 3 hours. This is how I plan to pay for those airline tickets. Last Faith Formation class at church to say goodbye to my senior class. The night ended on a high: GAME OF THRONES!
In a few words, I'm screwed for May June, July, and August. There's only so much "planning-ahead" a person can do. Believe it or not, this is actually a light year for me. Just ask anyone. I have dropped a few other duties that fit better when I was younger. This can't continue as I muddle through my 40s!!!
Here is what's on my plate for the next month:
~ Work - It's never ending and it's a given.
~ Landlord walkthrough - Remember how my landlord was kind enough to lower my rent $250/mo? We get to sign the lease tomorrow, but they also get to do a walk-through. Recall what I said about my house: HOARDERS. I am still cleaning at 9:00 pm.
~ Hem two band dresses for band performances on Wednesday night and for San Francisco Festival - Let me do that tomorrow after the walkthrough!
~ Chaperoning the middle school band-kid and 100 others at a competition in San Francisco - This needs no explanation. Prayers are welcome.
~ Preparing for my time away from the Hoosband and other kidlets - this means, making sure the tot has a way to and from school and making sure the kidlet and the Senior make it to the overnight event with the troop. Hopefully they'll feed themselves.
~ On top of this, I have 3 events (one work related and 2 fundraisers for 2 separate boards that I participate with) 2 BACK TO BACK, Fri/Sat and the other the following week - Expectations are HIGH for each. I have to beg for the next week and I have 4 days when I'm MIA locally. That really puts a kink into the plans.
~ On the backburner for May until I can get thru the fundraisers: Announcements, Grad party planning, mission trip planning for the Mid-Kid, Summer Bridge for the Grad, what to do with the kidlet for the summer while inhouse babysitting is away, Sending off the firstborn to the world. Don't get me started with that. I'm getting choked up just typing it.
~ DG's Pasadena signing - Arrangements have been made, but I have a feeling my mother will throw a wrench into the whole thing. More on that later.
~ Outlander at SDCC - This. Will. Be. EPIC.
~ OUTLANDER SOMETIME BEFORE SEPTEMBER (my guess is 1st wk of August, but who the hell knows).
I think Mother's Day is in there somewhere. Remind me, would ya?
I know I need to exercise, too. My job, if I'm not in the field, involves sitting on my ass. This is where I KNOW the extra 20 lbs came from. I just need to move the ass and eat better. That's another post.
Despite it all, my bitching and moaning, the headaches and sleepless nights, I know there's purpose. If I take a moment, just a small moment, mind you, I can feel the happiness of everyone around me. It's what I crave. In my mind, my success is measured by the satisfaction I feel when someone tells me how great a job I did for them. It makes the pains all worth it for me. Crazy? Probably. Would I do it all again? Absolutely! What would make it perfect? MORE TIME TO FANGIRL.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Accessory Fun - Outlander Style
How many times can I say things start as a joke? Somehow the best ideas are borne from poking fun at everything around you. From time to time some GREAT ideas are hatched and in the end you're left shaking your head at HOW things came about. I have quite a few. Some of my friends will remember my utter disgust at how we were asking for donations for items and/or $$$ for a fundraising basket at school. Typically we'd solicit everyone alive for stuff to create and out-do the next group. It was somewhat of an annual tradition, however that particular year the requests were going on just days after the devastating earthquake in Japan, where thousands died, even more were homeless and destitute. IMO, there was NO WAY I was planning to solicit anything for some gaudy basket just for praise and notoriety. Our class was NOT going to do it at all! Needless to say, I was coerced by many other parents and the instructor to plan this basket. I was furious. In my mind, IF this was going to happen, then the requests would be for provisions since WE live in California -Earthquake country! Hell, we were just going to ask for rations of water and candles. *sigh* Wouldn't you know that the basket was the biggest draw that year? Our Earthquake Preparedness kit was a HIT... And spiteful me put all our raffle tickets into that particular basket. And won.
Again, I have many similar stories. We jokingly consider doing things all the time. Inevitably once the wheels start turning the end result is something to behold!
My latest and greatest is tied to another "good idea."
Let me preface by saying, while I love and admire DG, the production team, the writing team, the entire cast, any of the crew, and even craft services, I do not hold myself to any one group. You might find me on a board or two, but I choose not to fall into quite a few fan groups for a gazillion reasons that are my own. Those are definitely on a need to know basis. Your feelings are spared just by not knowing. Seriously. Don't worry. I like most of you.
Let me also say I tend to not like doing things the way everyone else does. Originality goes a long way in my book. While I'm not a prude, I do feel that there's a level of taste that one can subscribe to while making your presence known out here in cyberspace. Toss in an original clever thought or two and it's just golden.
Having said that, @onapinandneedle and I were up late one night chatting about what "gift" should be given to any of the cast/crew we should happen to meet. I also wanted something I could make to give to my new found fangirl friends. In this case, we were talking about the LA Fan Event in January. EVERYTHING has been done: earrings, necklaces, t-shirts, pins, posters, books, thank you cards, birthday cards, food items (store bought and home made {eep}) charity donation requests, you name it. It would be like re-inventing the wheel. We joked all night about it, but @onapinandneedle just had to say that she would love a wristband/cuff with rivets. From that ONE idea, I came up with what would be my little side gig and I absolutely LOVE IT.
Incidentally, Sam and company did get their gifts. He indulged me for those few moments and even had me put it on his wrist (YES, I HELD HIS HAND FOR MORE THAN A FEW MOMENTS). No way Cait would wear it with Dolce, but she did admire the craftsmanship. It definitely wasn't going near DG's diamond tennis bracelet, but being the gracious woman that she is, she thanked me and put it with her other treasures from the fans. Ron was nice and held onto it. Maril was even sweeter, had me put it on her wrist, and said it was her favorite gift. She even tweeted it the next day. *sigh*
All this reminiscing brings me back to the idea borne from a joke. It's now a fun, fun way for me to contribute to the fandom. As a side bene, I make some pin money! I have the best time burning and staining each unique piece. Ok, the words might be the same, but each and every item is different. No two are alike in design. What I love the most is that nothing about it is kitschy, nor are they part of a bling-y trend. It just looks good. A bit rustic and boho enough for everyday, but still stylish to wear with a great outfit. (Oh, yeah, I wear mine everyday. Even today with my Easter outfit!!!)
If you don't have one of your own, be sure to stop by and visit my shop:
Some of you are even more creative than I am. Do you have a fun idea that started as a joke?
Interested in a coupon? Leave me a comment and I'll send one your way!
I'll leave you with highlights of last January. Oh, the heads on a stick? Those are ideas from another joke...
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| He asked to wear it. I almost fell on the floor. |
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| I just HAD to post since I'm remembering. That's the OTHER idea. |
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| Maril's Cuff |
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